Thursday, November 5, 2009

Express Yourselves (and your relationship) Through Music

A couple of months ago I had the opportunity to give Brides Magazine my input on some different ideas for songs to play during the formalities at a wedding (ceremony & reception). Reflecting on recent weddings I’ve done where the music was a bit different, I began to formulate a list that was, "The remedy for the common wedding music."

In writing the article for the magazine I tried to reach as many different types of couples as I could with my picks. I found that no matter what type of music is suggested, it has to be meaningful to the couple for it to work for them. Because music is such an important part of my life, it would be difficult for me to suggest the same songs to every couple that I work with for their ceremony, recessional or first dance. Just because I think a song is a good fit for one couple's first dance, doesn't mean it will work for another couple.

So instead of suggesting particular songs for the ceremony or reception, my job is to help the couple figure out what their collective identity is, and help them to display it through the music at their event. When a couple hires a DJ for their ceremony, they have free reign to communicate with their guests the type of love they share through music.

Some couples want to hear "The Wedding March" and "Here Comes the Bride" because they identify that music with a wedding. I feel as though that only scratches the surface. Why not find music you both enjoy that represents your relationship in the deepest way? Why not have your guests associate the lyrics and melodies of a particular song with the smell of the flowers you’ve picked and the sight of your beautiful dress? The best part about having a DJ at a ceremony is that you can pick any song, from any group, in any genre.

The music you select can accomplish several things. One may be to lighten the mood during the ceremony. I once had a client select REM’s, "It’s the End of the World" as their recessional song. The guests laughed - but it was a song the couple enjoyed.

Some couples choose a song they heard on the radio during their first date. When I worked with my couple from last weekend, they selected "Bed of Roses," by Bon Jovi as their first dance song. They did not choose that song because of the lyrics, or because it represented their relationship, rather they wanted that song because they met while standing outside in line for a Bon Jovi Concert and it met something to them.

Selecting the music for your wedding can be as trivial as using Google and searching for "Wedding Music" or as intricate as finding the acoustic version of Foo Fighters, "Everlong" that they sung while touring in Colorado. Either way the music should mean the most to you, and should convey the message of your love for one another. If your identity is shown through the style of dress you select, or type of flower you carry, the music should express the relationship you’re vowing to uphold.

-Matt

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